Kids at the Hospital

So we have been quite ill for a long time now, around six weeks. Gp can’t find anything wrong but calls me in this past Monday. More blood more peeing in a cup and an echocardiograph at the hospital yesterday.

This is a test where you lay on a table (back to the door, uh oh) the technician does an ultrasound on your heart. You get on a treadmill to get your heart rate way up then they do another ultrasound right away.

The woman who called us to come in the testing area very nice. She said are you nervous we said well I have c-PTSD and DID so I fear I’ll go away or otherwise lose my shit. She said that’s okay you’re in a hospital, we can take care of you. She did not seem to understand what could happen if we went away or were triggered but what choice but to go with it?

We had to have this gown, open to the front. The technician and our chick both explained what was going to happen. Okay, sounds doable.

Technician chick was groping around our boobs, because the heart is underneath them. Not so much. She couldn’t get a clear “shot” so asked if they could put in an IV to improve the contrast on the shots.

ZING!!!!! ten year old pops up says where am I? Technician says what our gal makes quiet noise technicial gal says oh. Big sigh. Well you’re at the hospital having a test on your heart. Explains again the process. Says can we do an IV to have better contrast on your shots. Not realizing that she’s talking to a kid who can’t understand what she is asking.

Am I in the hospital? Yes. Does Dr. Julie (gp) know I am
Here? Yes she does. She sent you here does T know I am here? Technician gal says I don’t know who that is can we inject you with this dye?

This is getting nowhere. Our gal steps in and explains everything again. Yes you’re supposed to be here nobody is going to hurt you. Very skeptical. Door to the room keeps opening and closing but she can’t see who it is.

Ummm I guess you can do that I don’t know where I am where am I? Okay we’re going to put this IV in, ok? Introduces me to yet another woman who injects the dye. This seems to please everybody.

So after a few minutes technician gal says okayet’s get you on the treadmill. I can’t breathe where am I? Sighs all around. Just start walking hon.

Walk on this treadmill until she fears passing out. Rush me back to the table for more pictures. At this point male doctor appears says how are you doing I don’t know where I am
Or what is happening. He says what do you mean. Quiet mumbling doc says well that makes no difference. Heaves a sign of patience. Kid terrified remember we don’t have amtop on really.

Does T know I am here? My gal says yes it is okay we’re almost done here. Where am I? Sighs like patience is being tried all around. Kid freaked out.

After a few minutes doctor says well I can’t send this to your doctor right away. The Furies pop in. Why? Well I have to look more closely at something. At what? Well I can’t really sY but there’s quite an anomaly here and I have to look more closely. Af what? Silence. At what? Silence.

This is why I love the Furies. Listen to me asshole. I am paying a king’s ransom for this test and I am not going to risk a total meltdown. He says meltdown? He’s a meltdown of our psyche that will wind up with us at a psych hospital due to stress over this and you don’t want thAt either because we wi sur your pants right off hour body. So just tell us what you see jackass.

Well, you have a significant portion of your heart that does not get oxygen when you’re exercising.

Thank you. At least I know what I am dealing with.

Our gal says okay you’re all done. You can go change and you’re free to go. Job done, Furies leave and someone around sevenish pops in. Where am I does Dr. Julie know I am here? Does T know I am here?

More impatient murmuring. Here she sayset me
Take you to where your stuff is and youncan chNge and go home. Able to dress herself but kid can’t figure out bow to get out of the lab. Finally our gal appears and points us to the door.

It takes 45 minutes to get out of hospital and into car.

Apparently nobody we encountered had ever dealt with DID patients before. Guess we were their only nutjob of the day.



  1. April 28, 2010 at 10:13 pm

    You are not a nutjob.

    • April 29, 2010 at 4:57 am

      Thanks. But from the perspective of an obviously untrained and hospital sta;…..hah. Thanks

  2. Karita said,

    April 29, 2010 at 4:46 am

    Oh, it sounds like such a stressful experience for you. Hope you’re resting now.

  3. April 29, 2010 at 5:02 am

    Why am I really the only person who thinks this is funny? Hahahahaha

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